Blessed

I'm always amazed at how easily we forget, how quickly our memory fades, and how quickly we adjust to a different routine or way of life. Summers illuminate my forgetfulness. The first week of summer vacation, I revel in my non-homework and non-school pressure life. Since those pressures are vivid and clear in my mind, I count my blessings of no school. As the summer progresses, I forgot about homework, papers, and the never ending days as I settle into my non-school routine, and I stop noticing that blessing. (I think of being out of school and all it's pressures as a blessing. I like having a life outside of school even though I love learning. But learning isn't contained in just a classroom.)

I may remember how much I have been blessed for a week or two, but then it fades until it takes more thought than I would like to admit to recall my blessings. I don't want to forget all the ways God has shown His faithfulness and care in my life. I don't want to forget those words of encouragement or little things which happen throughout a day. For Salaramie's wedding gift, I gave them a blessing box. I, well my mom actually found it, found a box, and I cut up colored card-stock. Salaramie were instructed to write a blessing on a piece of card-stock, date it, and store it in the blessing box, then when they were down and needing encouragement, they could read through their blessing cards and see how they have been blessed in the past.

While that may become my wedding gift for other friends because I love the idea so much, I think I need something like that in my life. Some place to record ways I've been blessed. I've been pondering my blessings because of specific ways I've been blessed in the past couple of days:

1. My current cooperating teacher JS encouraged me by saying she would write me a favorable recommendation even though I've only worked with her for two weeks because she says I'm doing a great job. I have the hardest time accepting compliments, but I'm working on that. Besides that awkward part, it was nice to be validated that I'm doing my job well.
2. I've been trying to build relationships at the different schools I'm student teaching at, but I wasn't sure if I was building those. This week, I received letters from my second graders saying how much they missed me and wished I could be with them. JS also said she would be interested in coming to church with me. She brought it up!
3. Peggy from work scheduled me Friday night because she knew I needed the hours. I also have fourteen hours this coming week instead of the four I had this week. I almost cried with relief when I learned both of those pieces of information.
4. I'm not getting ready to take finals, and I'm not finishing up all my projects this semester since I'M. NOT. TAKING. CLASSES!!!!! It's a great feeling to hear others talk about their final projects and exams, and I can just sympathize with them, but I'm not in their situation of all those lovely school demands.

Though I've shared these blessings with others, I needed to write them down because I know how quickly I forget how I've been blessed.

Too Much or Too Small

I can never decide if I have too much stuff or if my room is too small. For some reason, Sunday afternoon has started to become my organize and clean-up time in my room. I start the week with a freshly straightened room and by the end of the week it is a mess. I'm still learning how to live a busy life and keep my room clean and organized daily. If I presented this problem to my mother, I know what she would say--if I would set aside three to five minutes a day, I wouldn't have to worry about a more 'major' clean-up weekly. Back to my conundrum of too much or too small.

Let me explain my room. My room, closet, and the ten storage containers in the attic are home to all of my possessions. My room is square, maybe 15 x 15 feet.* I only have one full-sized bed, one nightstand, one chair, one filing cabinet, one dresser, and five bookcases (three tall and two small) in my room. My closet is maybe 4 x 6 feet.* I only have the majority of my clothes, four storage containers, extra hangers, extra blankets (I mound the blankets on my bed), and shoes scattered all over. (In today's cleaning, I decided I desperately need a shoe rack.) I only have ten large storage containers in the attic.

Now, I am honestly an organized person (though right now I feel awfully disorganized and smothered in my room since I can't find a way to organize my possessions so they'll stay organized). My books are all in alphabetical order by author. My t-shirts are sorted by color. My storage containers all have labels. I have a specific label for each of my file folders in my filing cabinet. I am a continual list maker. My clothes are organized by item (shirts, pants, dresses, shorts) and then within each item I group like items together (color, short-sleeved, long-sleeved).

I am frustrated that every weekend I am reorganizing the same articles or aspects. Each weekend I ask myself if I have too much stuff or if my room is too small. Though I keep memorabilia, I regularly purge everything. For instance, today I threw away five dresses and two boxes of books.

I think my current room organization issue is that I've acquired items which haven't been organized and designated a spot. Though the more I type and think about my problem I guess it doesn't matter if I have too much stuff or if my room is too small, I still need to take care of my possessions by finding a home for them and returning them to that home after they've been used. So, I will now probably think all evening and the majority of tomorrow about the best way to organize the places and aspects of room and possessions which do not have a home.

Yes, this is how much this is currently bothering me. Yes, I probably have a control and organization problem.

*My paltry estimations. 

Clarity Update

I meant to post about my life plans after my initial Clarity post; however, life got away from me, and I owe you an update.

I decided to not pursue teaching at a parochial school anymore; I am now applying at public schools. Since my weekend in Texas, I've submitted twenty-three applications. I haven't heard anything back from a school yet. I'm applying all over WI, though my first choice would be something in the area, so I can continue to be involved at my amazing church. Staying at New Testament is a major desire of mine. Daily I'm praying that the Lord will direct me to the right job for the fall whether it be close enough to continue attending New Testament or whether it requires me to move. I know the Lord will lead me to the right place for the fall.

This is the short version. I have peace about this--pursing a public school teaching position for the fall. If I don't have a job, then I would either sub or look for a para position. I'm confident in the Lord; I know I will be in the best place for me to serve Him in the fall. Everything will work out for His honor and glory.

Friday

Yesterday was my last day at LES. I didn't want to get up yesterday because I didn't want to have to say goodbye to my nineteen second graders and Mrs. O. I had such an amazing time. I learned so much; I grew as an educator and a person; I built relationships in the short nine weeks. I kept myself pretty composed except when I was thanking my students for the wonderful good bye gifts and when I came back to the classroom and I just watched them all for a couple of minutes. Sometimes you don't know the impact you've made until it's time for you to leave. That is what sunk into me yesterday or else people are very kind in how they say good bye and wish me luck.

Here are some pictures of what I received as my good bye gifts. I received a book from my second grade class, but I can't post it since it has my student's picture on it. Don't I have just the sweetest second graders?