Future Thoughts

My final semester of classes start in nine days. The joy that enters my mind and body is indescribable. And then the worry enters. I'm graduating from college in nine months. In nine months, I will have no more required plans. I have to start looking for a job. How am I going to find a job, I'm going into the teaching field?

Since high school, my plan has been to find a teaching job overseas when I finished college. As the years through college progressed, I had been planning on teaching at a Christian school in Hawaii. However, as the college years have progressed, I've come to the conclusion that I don't believe in Christian schools. If I don't believe in those kinds of schools, why would I teach there? So now, I'm faced with the thoughts of jumping out into the unknown.

The adventure of moving overseas intrigues me; it intrigues me a lot. Yet I'm not sure if I've worked through all the realistic and practical parts of moving overseas. Find a job at an international school. Find housing in _____ country and get settled. Move all my supplies over to _____ country and school. I know my sister RuthAnn moved overseas in two suitcases, but would that be possible for me? Get a visa. Learn a language. Be thousands of miles away from my family. Find a church body. Have no vehicle or learn to drive in a foreign country. Find a bank. Pay taxes in another country. Teach my own classroom for the first time in an international school.

Moving across the country scares me in a way I never would have imagined. I don't like this feeling. This wariness, timidity, nervousness (I can't find the right word) about the future doesn't seem like me. Well according to my perspective of myself. I've always thought of myself as a person who's willing to go wherever, whenever, and with whoever or with nobody. I have always groaned inwardly when people said they couldn't ever imagine moving away and specifically overseas; I've dreamed about moving overseas for years. Why all the wariness/worries? Why now? I don't want future worries to hinder me from continuing on my path.

I truly have no clue where the Lord will have me in a years time, but honestly it's okay because with all the worries, there's also a peace when I remember that He knows where I'll be in a year and that place will be the best place for me to serve Him at that time. I'll still be busy making plans and following leads, but it's reassuring and peaceful knowing it's all in His hands.